Supernova
by Shampoo
Summary: James's thoughts on a certain someone as he waits for her one night...


Disclaimer: Standard disclaimers apply.  
  
Summary: James's thoughts on a certain someone as he waits for her one night.  
  
Supernova  
  
That night, James decided, there was romance in the air. And what better time for the atmosphere to be perfectly amorous than the night, the long awaited night, that she was coming to him?  
  
Alone.  
  
For what seemed like a first time, they were going to be utterly, completely alone together. A smile graced James's mouth as he thought about every aspect of her. That illegally short skirt she wore, her high boots, her fiery personality... every bit of it added up to his dream woman. A strong, brave woman.  
  
His thoughts wandered deeper. How did she get her hair to stay like that? It must take hours. Why did she wear the same earrings? They certainly were pretty. Like her. She always said her motto lines with enthusiasm. Afterwards, she would have a radiant glow that made her look angelic.  
  
He didn't think she would ever even look in his direction. And why should she? Why should her dark, royal eyes stain themselves with his reflection? He didn't know. But they had. He'd seen his face in her eyes, and in that split second, he knew an image of himself had been burned into them.  
  
Granted, sometimes she called him names. She could even be openly violent to him. She would laugh at his misfortunes and come across as cold towards him.  
  
Not anymore.  
  
All it took was one second. Not love at first sight- he'd known her long enough to say otherwise. And now she wanted to be alone with him. For one night. He felt giddy and light the rest of the day. Meowth asked what he was smiling about, but James didn't tell. He didn't want to jinx it.  
  
It was just too perfect.  
  
And now the moon rose in the sky like a ghostly galleon, tossed among wispy cirrus clouds. A wind rippled across the grass in the clearing he sat in, causing the blades to sway and dance in silvery, individual patterns. The stars shone coldly, millions of eyes that would witness what James was sitting, waiting for. And he didn't care. He wanted the whole universe to know he loved her.  
  
He'd made plans. She'd made plans. No one would ever know about this one, single, painfully isolated night. But James fervently hoped it would not stay such a lonesome event. It could be a prologue, a beginning to many other starlit, romantic nights, with her in his arms. And, in time, days as well.  
  
Days and nights with her. Sun and moon, clouds and stars... he couldn't wait. He wanted everyone to know about them. He wanted to write it in the sky.  
  
James exhaled softly and gazed at the trees, his eyes so intent one would think he was trying to divine an answer from the intricate patterns of their old bark. Wasn't she coming?  
  
Icy, probing tendrils of doubt rose through his insides and permeated his senses. Of course she wasn't coming. Why should she?  
  
He didn't deserve her.  
  
She was perfect, and what was he? A runaway, a complainer, too sensitive, couldn't even hold his own against a little kid and his pikachu.  
  
Then again, it wasn't like she could, either.  
  
He closed his eyes. It didn't matter who she could win or lose against. He would always be right there, helping her out, cheering her on. And maybe, after everything was done, she would see him, and run to him, and fall into his arms.  
  
And he'd catch her. As simple as that.  
  
His eyes opened, blazingly, undeniably green. Their relationship would be anything but simplicity. If even a breath of it got out, their friendships, jobs, and even their very lives would be at stake.  
  
Everything would loop and twist and stretch until their whole lives would be transformed into tangles and tangles of love, hate, trust, and friendship.  
  
A huge knot. An impossible knot.  
  
Grinning, James flipped over and lay on his stomach, crossing his arms and putting his head down on them, watching the silent trees. Knots can be untied with careful, patient fingers.  
  
Or they can be sliced apart by something sharp in seconds.  
  
He didn't want any knots. He didn't feel patient or careful. Their tangled lives would just have to be left behind, because he didn't want to deal with them. He was in love. She was in love. Those two facts were enough. What else did they need?  
  
They'd run away.  
  
Looking back, James realized he was good at running from his problems. Ever since that fateful, snowy night when he was young, he'd been stumbling over himself, trying to get away. He also knew that if it wasn't for his running, he would have never met her. A light chuckle escaped his lips.  
  
Any minute now.  
  
Excitement bubbled up inside of him. Was she heading for him now? He said he would come first. She promised she'd follow. Her eyes were pure and sincere--- no one would have guessed she was a criminal at that moment.  
  
Time passed, slowly, interminably by. His eyes widened. Was he doomed to wander back to that camp, broken, while she slept, dreaming of some one else? He'd crawl into his sleeping bag, knowing she was close, but far, far away.  
  
James shivered, suddenly realizing how cold it was. Maybe it was the air, or maybe it was the world, but things were definitely cold.  
  
Images flickered across his consciousness. A cathedral. A bride. A bright, sunlit life with no problems or fears or worries, just lazy days passing the two of them by like clouds over the sun.  
  
My dream, he thought, is to live a life unlike this one, in a house, far from here, with the love of my life and our child.  
  
What's your dream?, he asked the emptiness, in hopes that somehow his voice would resonate through it all the way to her. Have we been keeping too much from each other?  
  
He blinked and sat up, hugging himself. She wasn't coming. He should have known. Why should she? What on Earth for?  
  
Life would go on, as usual. He'd see her, she'd see him, and not a word of this would pass between them. But James knew their love would hang in the air like an unspoken truth, pressing down on the two of them.  
  
He felt like a fool.  
  
Why had he come? Why had he dropped everything and run here, hopes and dreams and thoughts of love and a happy future spinning through his mind? If he hadn't... at least he would have had the satisfaction of knowing he hadn't lost to love.  
  
But he had. He had totally and completely succumbed to it, letting it envelop him and shape him into the sad, lone figure he was.  
  
Involuntarily, his fists doubled and his eyes burned. It wasn't her fault. Honestly, what person would step over the threshold of ambient, sideways glances and fleeting, lovelorn thoughts to a true relationship with him? What would be the point?  
  
James knew he'd lost. She'd never come. He would just have to keep dreaming.  
  
The wind picked up and blew through the trees, who moaned in response, echoing his sorrow. Tears formed and rolled down his cheeks, falling quietly onto the earth below. The high grass around him caught the gusts and began dancing feverishly, giving the entire area a frenzied feel. The blades whistled with a high, whining pitch, mocking him.  
  
Looking up, James surveyed the heavens. The millions of watching stars had seen his defeat, and it was spreading across the sky like a plague. He could feel celestial whispers, starlit scorn, and cosmic disdain directed at him.  
  
Would she see him tomorrow? Would she laugh? Or would her eyes remain elsewhere, fixed on a point he would never see?  
  
He put his head in his hands. Was this all a joke to her? It was her who had suggested it... this night, alone. He remembered her lifting a gloved hand to his face, silently imploring him to come. There was something behind her eyes--- something afraid, timid.  
  
But she was anything but weak.  
  
That, among a shifting, chaotic universe, was a fact. She was strong. James knew that lifetimes of courage could not have brought him to say the words she did, inviting him here, drawing him here like moons are drawn to planets.  
  
And what happens when suddenly, the planet is gone, and the moon has nothing to revolve around? It will spin haphazardly out of orbit, out of everything ordinary that it has ever known, and crash into whatever happens to be in its way, breaking into a million pieces.  
  
Was that his fate?  
  
Rising, James resisted the urge to fall back and close his eyes, sinking slowly and sleeping forever. This was it. He gave up. Lowering his head, he let life crash all about him, spanning forward to the torturous, slow days ahead that would be nothing but her and everything unattainable about her.  
  
And then, like a miracle, a shadow fell over the clearing ahead of him, running like a surreal ghost. A shapely, curvy surreal ghost. Like a dream, there she was. Everything. Her high boots, her short skirt, the red R emblazoned across her chest, her thick, shiny hair trailing down her back.  
  
She looked at him sadly, as if she could see the pain she had caused, and her generous red lips curved into a sensuous smile.  
  
James stepped forward, nearly tripping at his eagerness to gather her into his arms. She was here. His universe. His love.  
  
His Cassidy.  
  
*  
  
A/N: Ha ha ha. Oh I'm so funny. I'm sure quite a few of you could see that coming from a mile off, but for the rest of you... laugh it off laugh it off. :D But seriously, I think they make a nice couple. Anyone else agree? Please R/R. Flames welcome :D 


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